The Story of Phil... (Ages 3 and up)

There once was a boy named Phil, he was mean.




...and a boy named Trevor, he was nice.




Phil tried to teach Trevor a thing or two about hockey...




But got his ass kicked because Trevor was really good and frankly Phil was a blowhard.




Phil spent the next five minutes telling the ref a delightful story about love and travelling.




...while Trevor pondered his seven figure salary.




Phil spent a lot of time on the bench after that, because that is what bad people do after they are bad. And remember, Phil was bad.




Spartacat tried to make Phil happy, but Phil dropped him with a quick uppercut.




Bad, Phil. Bad.


PS: Here are three people who can actually play, Daniel Alfredsson, Patrick Lalime, and Shawn MacEachern.